All Good Things Must Come To An End

This is me 2018. It’s been a year of extreme highs and inevitable lows; growing and birthing a beautiful baby boy has been magical, momentous and equally terrifying!

Motherhood has connected me to a love so profound it scares me how fiercely one can love another human; but parenthood has also brought me to my knees, literally. I’ve been floored both physically and emotionally and some days I’ve barely recognised the woman staring back at me in the mirror.

I’ve been pushed to all of my edges and limits and there have been days when I’ve cracked and broken into a gazillion pieces. Feeling vulnerable is an understatement. Parenting has a way of unearthing all of your unhealed wounds and past traumas. (I highly recommend it, it’s great therapy!)

Yet even in my darkest hours a silent voice has reminded me that I’m also resilient AF, and this woman is by no means shattered beyond repair. In fact, quite the opposite. I’ve earnt my strong Mumma wings and I am spreading them far and wide in 2019 with nothing but love and gratitude for this transformational journey I’m on. I welcome the continuing growth and expansion that’s to come for both myself and my little family.

I gave up on New Years resolutions years ago, but I do like to set a theme for the year and I’m making 2019 my year of TRUST.

I am trusting in myself, I am trusting in my intuition, I am trusting in my worth as a woman, I trust in my capacity to continue to give as a mother, I trust in the goodness of others, I trust that the Universe has our back and is supporting my family regardless of what life throws our way.

And on that note I’m shaking my booty into 2019 with a twinkle in my eye and a heart full of love, compassion, acceptance, forgiveness, faith and gratitude for all I have learnt and all I am willing to let go of.

2018, thank you for the lessons. 2019, I am ready!

I will be taking a break for blogging on WordPress but you can find me on Instagram and Facebook by following the links in the sidebar 👉🏻

Dear Dad has been my home for 5 years of writing, but I’ll admit I’ve struggled to maintain my blog since becoming a mother. It doesn’t feel right blogging here when I simply don’t have the time to reciprocate by reading all of your magical blogs.

And so I am taking a break from this platform but will continue to post on my Instagram feed!

I will reserve this space for its original intent, which was, and still is, a place for me to simply say: Dear Dad…

Thank you for being so supportive over the years and for the loving connections I have gained from this sacred space, I love each and every one of you 💖

Love always

Peace out ✌🏻

Hayley xx

Better, Not Bitter

Life was never meant to be easy… Joyful? Fulfilling? Abundant? Yes. But easy? No.

Life is meant to challenge us; to encourage us to grow and to evolve.

Those testing times which threaten to make us bitter are, in fact, designed to make us BETTER.

How do you respond to life’s difficulties? Do you choose to be a victim of circumstances, finger pointing and blaming others for your misfortune? Or do you choose to welcome life’s challenges as an opportunity to own your shit and RISE UP? To choose another way?

Today, welcome challenge with an open heart. Be grateful for the chance to be BETTER, not bitter.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Sacred Home

Pregnancy has certainly brought with it many physical and emotional challenges; some which have been easier to embrace than others! It’s been a constant journey of reconnecting with myself and the life-force within to fully appreciate and accept all the changes my body must undergo to create and birth this precious new life.

I can’t stress enough the importance of caring for our emotional and physical wellbeing during this delicate transition. This is something I’ve had to remind myself daily.

There have been days and weeks when my health has been at it’s optimal, and days when I’ve opted to skip my self-care practice and nourishment to reach for that comforting treat.

The key here is to monitor your self-talk and remember to be BE KIND. Be mindful of how you talk to yourself. Your body listens!!!! So no berating or self-judgment please ladies…

But just as your body listens, your body talks.

Are you listening to your body and what it needs? Rest, fresh air, movement, nourishment, gentle caresses and positive-self-talk?

There is no better time than the present to love and care for your body, your sacred home 🙏🏻 So what are you waiting for?

Love always,

Hayley xx

Feel the Feels

Some days you just want to hide under the duvet and stay there. That was me half an hour ago.

And instead of taking a shower and doing my morning yoga before my green juice, I scraped back my hair, walked straight into the kitchen and made two buttered crumpets and a cup of tea!

I’ve had my little moment of emotional comfort. But I’m not going to let that seep into the rest of my day.

I’m going to get my sorry butt into that shower, do my morning yoga and feel 98% better for doing so! Then I’m going to guzzle my sexy green juice and feel zero guilt about the crumpets I scoffed this morning.

Why? Because I’m human and everyone deserves a moment to feel all the feels before getting dressed and showing up to the world.

Peace ✌🏻

Love always,

Hayley xx

Love Over Fear

Whether we choose fear or we choose love – both are just that; a choice. ‘I believe that every single event in life happens in an opportunity to choose love over fear.’ – Oprah Winfrey

When we live in our shadow; fear, worry, anxiety, disappointment, anger, blame, doubt, resistance and resentment reign. Such reactions to discomfort are a result of social conditioning, past traumas, learned behaviours and the false perceptions of our ego. But in any moment, we can choose to live in our light.

Acceptance, understanding, joy, awareness, trust, surrender and forgiveness are all acts of love. Love has the power to dissolve even the greatest of fears – to illuminate even the darkest recesses of our minds.

Whatever fears are holding you back – choose love. Everything in life has it’s opposite. Even fear serves a purpose – without fear, we could not recognise our ability to emerge from the darkness into the brightness of our very essence.

Today, acknowledge your fears. Make peace with them. And watch how they melt in the light of your love.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Heavy Hearts

Don’t be afraid to cry. There is nothing wrong with releasing those tears and letting them flow with grace and ease.

Honour your emotions. No need to hide or pretend or to put on a brave face.

However overwhelmed or lost you may feel, trust that you are safe, loved and protected. The Universe always has your back, even when you feel like turning your back on the world.

FEEL what you need to feel; every ounce of hurt, anger, sadness, pain, loss and despair. And then release. Surrender. Allow.

Trust that like the changing tides, you will move, shift and evolve from this experience. You have not come this far in your journey to be defeated and deflated now. You ARE strong. You ARE Divine. You are perfectly loved, loveable, loving, whole and complete. And nobody or circumstance can ever take that away from you.

You’ve got this.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Soulful Sunday #47: Inevitable Disagreements

Welcome to my forty-seventh instalment of ‘Soulful Sundays’. A weekly share where I post a
roundup of soulful reflections, each including recipes, songs, quotes, blogs I have read and/or any other inspirational discoveries to sooth the soul.

For me, Sunday’s have become a day of quiet contemplation and simple pleasures. A time to reflect on the week gone by and to consider my hopes and dreams for the week ahead.

My hope is to extend some love outward and to share some simple pleasures with anyone who cares to receive them.

Soul Reflections

I have long held the opinion that arguments are unavoidable. Those who claim ‘Oh we never argue!’ I suspect to be dishonest or slightly delusional. Healthy relationships are not about NEVER disagreeing, but more about HOW we disagree.

How would we ever learn, grow and expand our world if we all just agreed? Besides, life would be very boring and monotonous.

The more we are able to engage in enthusiastic disagreement with each other, the more we will be able to uncover the best in ourselves and each other. – Karen Kimsey-House

Whilst disagreements aren’t avoidable, there ARE healthy and unhealthy ways to argue. I resonate with this quote by Dave Willis:

In marriage disagreements are inevitable but disrespect is a choice.

I believe this to be true in any relationship, be it with a partner, parent, sibling, friend or complete stranger. Maintaining respect for another during conflict eases our ability to heal and find harmony afterwards. On the other hand, disrespect, especially when repeated, often leads to irreparable suffering and resentment.

The key to finding unity is forgiveness, and it is far easier to forgive when a high degree of dignity is maintained during disagreements than if we say or do something we may later regret.

Next time you are triggered in the thick of conflict, before you hurl insults, or cause verbal or even physical harm to another, remember the severity of suffering this one senseless act can cause. Vow instead to view any disagreement as an opportunity to grow, to learn more about yourself, your strengths, your weaknesses, and those of another.

This is how we stand united in our division.

Soul Strolls

My partner and I finally managed to get away camping this weekend. We visited Yanakee near Wilson’s Prom, a beautiful campsite close to the waters edge.

Like with any relationship, there were moments of discord coupled with moments of pure surrender and softness. I wouldn’t trade any of the more challenging moments during our trip, because they each taught me something about myself and my man. And, yes! whilst there were moments we wanted to tear each other’s hair out, at the end of our trip we stood united, smiling and holding one another in earnest.

In my life, I have experienced deep levels of disrespect. I have felt firsthand suffering and pain as a result. Today, I stand tall in forgiveness. I am grateful for every experience so far, for they each taught me new levels of being and living in this world.

Yanakee, Melbourne

Like this colourful ocean before me, there are moments of unrest and moments of calm – but deep down at it’s very core, all is perfect, pure and still.

Soul Food

Soul food this weekend was camp food! I created these little Parma Cups based on an Aussie fave, Parmigiana. All the yumminess of a traditional Parmi placed into little puff pastry cups. Perfect for an Aussie camping trip.

Soul Music

Waking up surrounded by nature certainly created for a ‘dreamy Sunday morning’. So I am sharing Clouds by Hugo Kant so that you too may experience dreaminess, wherever you may be.

Soul Sisters

Today I am sharing Bernice’s post, Your Eyes Are The Mirror To Your Soul. A beautiful reminder that respect includes oneself. Head on over for some beautiful affirmative statements that embody all that you are through the power of mirror work and self-love!

Wishing you all a dreamy Sunday.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Prisoners of the Past

The past has a funny way of creeping up on us. Just when we thought we were free from it’s constraints,  we suddenly find ourselves prisoners of the past once more.

So how do we free ourselves from this unwelcome visitor?  The key is to recognise the patterns in Past’s behaviour.

When does Past come knocking? When does Past knock the loudest? When is Past’s presence so insistent that he imposes on your present day peace and happiness?

You may not be able to prevent Past from visiting, but you CAN be prepared. You might start by politely requesting he move on. If he is insistent, tell him to fuck off and jog on! You have a right to close the door on Past, just as you have the freedom to open the door to Present and Future.

The truth is, Past will always come knocking, and often unexpectedly. But YOU have the power to choose what to do when he does.

Be not a prisoner of your own home. Free yourself.

‘Stand up and walk out of your history.’

Dr. Phil McGraw

Love Always,

Hayley xx

Love Over Fear

Whether we choose fear or we choose love – both are just that; a choice.

I believe that every single event in life happens in an opportunity to choose love over fear.

– Oprah Winfrey

When we live in our shadow; fear, worry, anxiety, disappointment, anger, blame, doubt, resistance and resentment reign. These preconditioned reactions to discomfort are a result of social conditioning, past traumas, learned behaviours and the false perceptions of our ego. But in any moment, we can choose to live in our light.

Acceptance, understanding, joy, awareness, trust, surrender and forgiveness are all acts of love. Love has the power to dissolve even the greatest of fears – to illuminate even the darkest recesses of our minds.

Whatever fears are holding you back – choose love. Everything in life has it’s opposite. Even fear serves its purpose – without fear, we could not recognise our ability to emerge from the darkness into the brightness of our very essence.

Today, acknowledge your fears. Make peace with them. And watch how they melt in the light of your love.

I love & light,

Hayley xx

Transformation Is Often Hard

Transformation isn’t always a walk in the park. In fact, it’s often a hike up a rocky cliff – sometimes we stumble and find ourselves stuck in a deep, dark crevice.

Just two days from reaching the finish line of sober October, I woke with a hangover from hell. Immediately, I began to criticise, self-punish and drag myself through the mud: “Failure… Did you actually think you could remain sober? When will you ever learn? Clearly you’re not capable of breaking this repetitive cycle…”

And then I remembered, transformation is about progress, not perfection. As I allowed myself to be held and supported, I thought of the advice I would offer a friend or loved one in the same position: Be gentle on yourself. Too often we speak to ourselves in harsh, reprimanding tones – rejecting a part of ourselves as ‘not good enough’, when in fact, we are perfectly imperfect just the way we are. Transformation takes time.

Today, be gentle on yourself. Embrace the messy moments along with the magical ones, for they all form part of your growth and expansion. Trust that from the darkness, a beautiful butterfly is emerging. The journey may be slow, but it is one worth taking.

The road ahead is clear and free. I give myself permission to move out of the past with gratitude and into a joyous new day.’

– Louise L Hay

In love & light,

Hayley xx