All Good Things Must Come To An End

This is me 2018. It’s been a year of extreme highs and inevitable lows; growing and birthing a beautiful baby boy has been magical, momentous and equally terrifying!

Motherhood has connected me to a love so profound it scares me how fiercely one can love another human; but parenthood has also brought me to my knees, literally. I’ve been floored both physically and emotionally and some days I’ve barely recognised the woman staring back at me in the mirror.

I’ve been pushed to all of my edges and limits and there have been days when I’ve cracked and broken into a gazillion pieces. Feeling vulnerable is an understatement. Parenting has a way of unearthing all of your unhealed wounds and past traumas. (I highly recommend it, it’s great therapy!)

Yet even in my darkest hours a silent voice has reminded me that I’m also resilient AF, and this woman is by no means shattered beyond repair. In fact, quite the opposite. I’ve earnt my strong Mumma wings and I am spreading them far and wide in 2019 with nothing but love and gratitude for this transformational journey I’m on. I welcome the continuing growth and expansion that’s to come for both myself and my little family.

I gave up on New Years resolutions years ago, but I do like to set a theme for the year and I’m making 2019 my year of TRUST.

I am trusting in myself, I am trusting in my intuition, I am trusting in my worth as a woman, I trust in my capacity to continue to give as a mother, I trust in the goodness of others, I trust that the Universe has our back and is supporting my family regardless of what life throws our way.

And on that note I’m shaking my booty into 2019 with a twinkle in my eye and a heart full of love, compassion, acceptance, forgiveness, faith and gratitude for all I have learnt and all I am willing to let go of.

2018, thank you for the lessons. 2019, I am ready!

I will be taking a break for blogging on WordPress but you can find me on Instagram and Facebook by following the links in the sidebar 👉🏻

Dear Dad has been my home for 5 years of writing, but I’ll admit I’ve struggled to maintain my blog since becoming a mother. It doesn’t feel right blogging here when I simply don’t have the time to reciprocate by reading all of your magical blogs.

And so I am taking a break from this platform but will continue to post on my Instagram feed!

I will reserve this space for its original intent, which was, and still is, a place for me to simply say: Dear Dad…

Thank you for being so supportive over the years and for the loving connections I have gained from this sacred space, I love each and every one of you 💖

Love always

Peace out ✌🏻

Hayley xx

Learning To Walk

Our subconscious mind can be our worst enemy, yet it can also be our greatest teacher and ally.

Most of our habits and automatic reactions stem from our subconscious mind. These auto responses are usually triggered when we’re caught off guard.

For this reason, most of us have a negative relationship with our subconscious mind because it seems to keep us stuck in the past, binding us to old worn out beliefs.

But without our subconscious mind we’d be f*cked.

We need auto responses. It’s what enables us to drive a car without too much thought and allows us to walk without thinking.

We couldn’t always walk and drive this way. It took a lot of falling over, stopping and starting and stalling before it became easy. But we got there in the end through practice, patience, perseverance, sheer grit and determination. Why? Because we believed we could.

Our subconscious mind is trained to act out our beliefs.

What beliefs are holding you back and keeping you stuck on replay? Is everyone out to get you? Is money hard to come by? Trust no-one. Nothing comes for free! Life is hard…

Today, make peace with your subconscious. Consider which old, worn out beliefs are standing between you and the life you deserve.

What new beliefs and behaviours can you make part of your present day reality? Now, just like this little girl, ☝🏻 put one foot in front of the other and don’t give up.

Dare to take that first step towards your dreams.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Roses and Thorns

Life is full of duality; love – hate; light – dark, peace – war; up – down; good – evil; life – death…

Life is a bed of roses when everything is going smoothly and all we feel is love, peace, harmony and joy. But when life’s contrasts show up, which inevitably they do, they are often met with some resistance.

But the ‘thorns’ of life form a necessary part of our existence. Without them, how would we know and come to appreciate their opposite?

For example, how can we be fully alive without the knowledge that one day we will meet death? How can we feel warmth without having first experienced cold? How can we know the fullness of true love if we’ve yet to meet with heartache and pain?

Instead of viewing life’s contrasts as something ‘bad’ to be avoided, we can begin to appreciate the learning and growth we gain from such moments.

We needn’t LOVE the thorns as such, but we do need to respect them; for every rose in life bares thorns of wisdom🌹

Love always,

Hayley xx

Transformation Is Often Hard

Transformation isn’t always a walk in the park. In fact, it’s often a hike up a rocky cliff – sometimes we stumble and find ourselves stuck in a deep, dark crevice.

Just two days from reaching the finish line of sober October, I woke with a hangover from hell. Immediately, I began to criticise, self-punish and drag myself through the mud: “Failure… Did you actually think you could remain sober? When will you ever learn? Clearly you’re not capable of breaking this repetitive cycle…”

And then I remembered, transformation is about progress, not perfection. As I allowed myself to be held and supported, I thought of the advice I would offer a friend or loved one in the same position: Be gentle on yourself. Too often we speak to ourselves in harsh, reprimanding tones – rejecting a part of ourselves as ‘not good enough’, when in fact, we are perfectly imperfect just the way we are. Transformation takes time.

Today, be gentle on yourself. Embrace the messy moments along with the magical ones, for they all form part of your growth and expansion. Trust that from the darkness, a beautiful butterfly is emerging. The journey may be slow, but it is one worth taking.

The road ahead is clear and free. I give myself permission to move out of the past with gratitude and into a joyous new day.’

– Louise L Hay

In love & light,

Hayley xx