You Are Infinite

Just prior to having my son, I attended a mums and bubs group. A beautiful Mumma was brave enough to share her struggles on becoming a mum. One aspect of motherhood she found particularly challenging was the sudden loss of her identity; no longer was she successful business owner, socialite, spontaneous lover and friend (or so it seemed) – her identity was now: ‘full time mum.’

I’m sure we’ve all identified with this feeling at some stage. When each waking hour (and every sleeping hour for that matter) is spent nursing and caring for your little one, it’s easy to lose sight of the person you once were prior to parenting.

A good friend of mine recently said; “I want to say you’re an amazing mother, but you are so much more than that…”

Her words melted deep into my heart. Without realising, I’d longed to hear those words… she was right. I am so much more than a mother.

I am a woman. I am divine. I am sexy. I am fun. I am a lover, daughter, sister and friend. I am courageous. I am strong. I am resilient. I am determined. I am infinite potential. I am eternal. I am WHOLE. I am love. I am at peace with myself. I am all of that and more and yes, I am a dam good mother too.

Remember, you are a multi dimensional being unbound by names, possessions and identities. You are an untethered force of light and love here to shine bright like the star that you are. 💫

Today, break free from the chains that bind you to names and titles. Embrace all that is you.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Soulful Sunday #53: Be Your Vulnerable Self

Welcome to my fifty-third instalment of ‘Soulful Sundays’; a weekly share where I post a roundup of soulful reflections, each including recipes, songs, quotes, blogs I have read and/or any other inspirational discoveries to sooth the soul.

For me, Sunday’s have become a day of quiet contemplation and simple pleasures. A time to reflect on the week gone by and to consider my dreams and intentions for the week ahead.

My hope is to extend some love outward and to share some simple pleasures with anyone who cares to receive them.

Soul Reflections

This week I’ve been sitting with my vulnerabilities and allowing myself to feel into what arises, trusting that it’s all there to teach me and to help me to grow.

How many of us automatically reply “I’m well thank you!” when asked how we are, when in actual fact – we are not ok? We feel we are burdensome or negative company if we actually share what’s really going on.

Today, I’d like you to consider what support may be available to you if you showed up in your authentic state and gave yourself permission to be vulnerable and open. Remember, in doing so you allow others to do the same.

Let us let go of the surface level interactions we’ve maintained as our shield of protection and be willing to dive deep.

Allow yourself to receive the support you need. You are worthy.

Soul Strolls

With 9 weeks of pregnancy left, I am still continuing my soul strolls around my neighbourhood. I’m finding it’s not long before I have to empty my bladder these days so I can’t stray too far from home. But even around the local area there is much beauty to be found.

‘If you truly love nature, you will find beauty everywhere.’ – Vincent Van Gogh

Soul Food

I am loving cashew cheese at the moment, but i’m not loving the price! Which is why I plan to have a go at making my own. I found this fermented cashew cheese recipe which I plan to try! If you haven’t tasted Cashew Cheese yet, I highly recommend it, especially on some toasted sourdough with a sprinkle of paprika! Yum! And the best news is, it’s super healthy for your gut – bonus 🙂

Soul Music

I’d love to share this beautiful song by India Arie titled I Am Light. A timely reminder that whatever we are going through, however we are feeling, at our very core we are love and light. Each day we get to reshape ourselves, to reinvent and recreate our experiences based on this recognition. I hope you tune in for a listen…

On this Soulful Sunday, I wish you a peaceful week ahead. Trust that you are safe and secure, even in your vulnerable self. Be open to receiving the support you need. And remember, your biggest Source of support lies within; connect with it, ask for what you need – and above all else, remember your own strength.

Soul Sisters

A fellow writer who I admire for always writing from the heart and saying it ‘how it is’, is Tanya from The Incurable Dreamer. She has the ability to make me laugh out loud whilst also bringing a heartfelt tear to my eye. One of my favourite posts Tanya has written is A Storm So Perfect , where she embodies her vulnerable self so well. Head on over for a valuable read!

Love Always,

Hayley xx

Love Over Fear

Whether we choose fear or we choose love – both are just that; a choice.

I believe that every single event in life happens in an opportunity to choose love over fear.

– Oprah Winfrey

When we live in our shadow; fear, worry, anxiety, disappointment, anger, blame, doubt, resistance and resentment reign. These preconditioned reactions to discomfort are a result of social conditioning, past traumas, learned behaviours and the false perceptions of our ego. But in any moment, we can choose to live in our light.

Acceptance, understanding, joy, awareness, trust, surrender and forgiveness are all acts of love. Love has the power to dissolve even the greatest of fears – to illuminate even the darkest recesses of our minds.

Whatever fears are holding you back – choose love. Everything in life has it’s opposite. Even fear serves its purpose – without fear, we could not recognise our ability to emerge from the darkness into the brightness of our very essence.

Today, acknowledge your fears. Make peace with them. And watch how they melt in the light of your love.

I love & light,

Hayley xx

Gentle Strength

I believe it takes a strong person to be gentle. There is a benign strength that exists in the tenderhearted.

I am forever grateful to have been blessed with a compassionate father figure. However brief our time together was, the lessons and blessings remain infinitely eternal. He was known as our gentle giant. All six foot two inches of him was benevolent and kind. Despite living with epilepsy, and four feisty females, he never once wavered from love and compassion. Dad’s inner strength has remained a guiding light for right action in my own life. I don’t always get it right, but I certainly do try.

Where and when can we practice gentleness in our own lives? One of my favourite quotes by the Dalai Lama states:

‘Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.’

It takes strength and courage to choose kindness; to be humble when faced with adversity; to consider the needs of others when our own are not being met, and to be vulnerable when our hearts are on the line. But when we are guided by the part of us that is honest, good-natured and true, we remind others that it is safe to do the same.

Today, find the strength to be gentle. May our thoughts be forgiving and merciful, may our words inspire and uplift, and may our actions show compassion and empathy in all circumstances – towards others as well as ourselves. Because ‘nothing is so strong as gentleness; nothing so gentle as real strength.’

In love & light,

Hayley xx

Beyond The Ego

Ahh the ego. We all have one. That shadow side in each of us which grasps, blames, condemns, judges, offends, defends, competes, sabotages, attacks and punishes. And whilst we’d all love to be egoless beings, part of the human experience consists of the contrast between our light and shade. Some days we are triggered, our ego is revealed, and there is little we can do to avoid this. At best we can breathe, notice, and learn to respond rather than react. It’s not our job to judge or condemn the behaviour of others, nor should we criticise our own momentary descents into the ego.

At a soul level, we are all equally loveable, perfect, whole and complete.

Beyond our egos, we each possess within us a light of awareness; our authentic Self. Our soul. That peaceful part of us that forgives, loves, accepts, understands, inspires, compliments, encourages, nurtures, perseveres, expands and seeks the Truth. We must look beyond our character flaws and discover the perfect soul within. Our aim is to reach a stage where we can say to one another: ‘The soul in me sees the soul in you.’ – regardless of how much pain and suffering has been caused. That is how we forgive – that is how we love; ourselves as well as others.

Today, be unafraid to show that tender side of you. The side of you who is loving and accepting of another’s flaws. For in doing so, we accept our own.

Let us not forget that ‘the authentic self is the soul made visible.’

In love & light,

Hayley xx

Roses On My Table

Whilst it is perfectly acceptable to wear diamonds on our neck, and I begrudge no one for doing so – I am with Emma Goldman, in that there is much beauty to be found in the simple.

For some, it is the taste of rich, dark chocolate and a full bodied red after a hard day’s work. Maybe it is the sweet pop of cherries bursting in our mouths on a long, hot summers day? Or the soft podgy padding of an infant’s hand reminding us of the sweetness of innocence?

Whatever our ‘roses on the table’ may be, may we revere and savour the simple, and remember that we needn’t wear diamonds on our necks to experience the richness of life.

In love and light,

Hayley xx

Be The Light

There are some things in life we feel are simply unforgivable. So horrific, in fact, that we question: What kind of a God would allow this to happen? We question why a loving God would allow countries to be at war and people to die of hunger. But as Marianne Williamson reminds us: ‘Thirty-five thousand people a day die of hunger on earth, and there’s no dearth of food. The question is not, “What kind of a God would let children starve?” but rather, “What kind of people let children starve?”

So are we to direct our anger away from God and towards our fellow brothers and sisters instead? As purging as this may initially feel; to vent and blame and shake our fists at all the darkness we see in the world, will only add to the hatred and misery in it. As we express our rage we further mar our planet with our own discontent.

To penetrate the darkness, we must become the light. But what if the darkness is too overwhelming to bare? Then we must pray that we will find the courage to be the light amidst the darkness, and that others will find the strength to do the same.

A Course in Miracles states: Miracles are seen in light, and light and strength are one.

Our goal, therefore, is to illuminate our corner of the world, however small that corner may be. To shine our light on all with whom we meet so that they too, can feel safe to do the same. It is our light, not our darkness, that will make a change.

You may have heard the tale of The Little Soul in The Sun, by Neale Donald Walsch, the story of a little soul who announces to God: “I know who I am!”

God smiled and said: “Who are you?” To which the little soul replied; “I am Light.”

“Yes you are,” replied God.

But the little soul, living amongst others who also shone with the perfect brilliance of God’s light, felt like a candle in the sun. Amidst the beautiful light of which the little soul was a part of, it could not see or experience itself as it really was. The little soul yearned to experience itself as Light.

And so one day, witnessing the little soul’s yearnings, God suggested: “Little Soul, if you really want to see yourself as you really are, then you must call upon the darkness. You must separate yourself from the rest of the light so that you can experience yourself as light amidst the darkness.”

“What is Darkness?” the little soul enquired inquisitively.

“That which you are not,” replied God, and the soul understood.

And so the little soul did. It separated itself from the light and experienced all sorts of darkness. At it’s deepest despair it called out to God, “Father Father why hast thou forsaken me?”  

God replied, “I have not forsaken you. I stand by you always, ready to remind you of who you really are; ready, always ready, to call you home. Therefore, be a light unto the darkness and curse it not. And forget not who you are in the moment of your encirclement by that which you are not.”

Little Soul in the Sun is a timeless parable which serves to reminds us that without darkness, there can be no light; without fear, we could never know love; without up, we could never experience down.

Let us not forget ourselves amidst the darkness, and may we always remember that we are the light.

In love and light,

Hayley xx

Progress Not Perfection

Perfectionism. We’ve all been there. Striving for an elusive paradigm that, thankfully, does not exist.

One of the best pieces of advice I was ever given was: Progress, not perfection. As a child who was so preoccupied with the neatness of her handwriting and the symmetry of her drawings that she rarely completed a piece of work; and as young woman who would shovel an entire 500ml tub of cookie and cream Hagan Daaz into her gob because she’d succumbed to a biscuit that day at work; this simple revelation truly set me free.

No longer do I beat myself up for ‘falling off the bandwagon’. Nor do I spiral out of control if I step one foot away from my (sometimes ridiculously high) standards.  And yes – I now complete work that before, I was too afraid to even begin.  I hit ‘publish’ on posts that are far from perfect and most likely have typos and incorrect grammar! But who’s judging? I finally realised that my biggest judge had always been me. That I was my biggest critic. No-one else. Me. Once I realised this, I could relax. Breathe. I could simply allow myself to be. To be unapologetically me, with all of my flaws and imperfections.

It feels good to have cracks, to have flaws, to be human just like everybody else. Because as Leonardo Cohen reminds us:

There’s a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.

-Leonardo Cohen

Progress, not perfection. As long as we are making progress, learning from our mistakes, remembering to be kind towards ourselves and others whenever those blessed mistakes do appear; then I promise you – those cracks will allow the light to flood your very essence with love and acceptance for all, including yourself.

In love and light,

Hayley xx