All Good Things Must Come To An End

This is me 2018. It’s been a year of extreme highs and inevitable lows; growing and birthing a beautiful baby boy has been magical, momentous and equally terrifying!

Motherhood has connected me to a love so profound it scares me how fiercely one can love another human; but parenthood has also brought me to my knees, literally. I’ve been floored both physically and emotionally and some days I’ve barely recognised the woman staring back at me in the mirror.

I’ve been pushed to all of my edges and limits and there have been days when I’ve cracked and broken into a gazillion pieces. Feeling vulnerable is an understatement. Parenting has a way of unearthing all of your unhealed wounds and past traumas. (I highly recommend it, it’s great therapy!)

Yet even in my darkest hours a silent voice has reminded me that I’m also resilient AF, and this woman is by no means shattered beyond repair. In fact, quite the opposite. I’ve earnt my strong Mumma wings and I am spreading them far and wide in 2019 with nothing but love and gratitude for this transformational journey I’m on. I welcome the continuing growth and expansion that’s to come for both myself and my little family.

I gave up on New Years resolutions years ago, but I do like to set a theme for the year and I’m making 2019 my year of TRUST.

I am trusting in myself, I am trusting in my intuition, I am trusting in my worth as a woman, I trust in my capacity to continue to give as a mother, I trust in the goodness of others, I trust that the Universe has our back and is supporting my family regardless of what life throws our way.

And on that note I’m shaking my booty into 2019 with a twinkle in my eye and a heart full of love, compassion, acceptance, forgiveness, faith and gratitude for all I have learnt and all I am willing to let go of.

2018, thank you for the lessons. 2019, I am ready!

I will be taking a break for blogging on WordPress but you can find me on Instagram and Facebook by following the links in the sidebar 👉🏻

Dear Dad has been my home for 5 years of writing, but I’ll admit I’ve struggled to maintain my blog since becoming a mother. It doesn’t feel right blogging here when I simply don’t have the time to reciprocate by reading all of your magical blogs.

And so I am taking a break from this platform but will continue to post on my Instagram feed!

I will reserve this space for its original intent, which was, and still is, a place for me to simply say: Dear Dad…

Thank you for being so supportive over the years and for the loving connections I have gained from this sacred space, I love each and every one of you 💖

Love always

Peace out ✌🏻

Hayley xx

Faith Over Fear

As I journey through this lifetime, an ancient teaching becomes clearer with each passing day; we really only ever have two choices – love, or fear.

All of our choosing, all of our doing, our thinking, our responses, our actions, our REactions and our beliefs are born out of these two choices; love, or fear.

Whenever I’m feeling misaligned from my true self, I can guarantee there’s an underlying fear present; fear of failure, fear of abandonment, fear of loss, fear of not being ’enough’… fear of being ‘too much’, fear of offending, fear of rocking the boat and yes, even fear of succeeding. We can be fearful of our own greatness and our unique gifts and talents too.

Today, notice any fears bubbling beneath the surface. How do they inform your words, thoughts, deeds and actions? See if you can choose again. What happens when you greet your fears with faith and love?

In my experience, the simple choice to choose love over fear has the power to change the entire trajectory of our experience.

So what will you choose?

Love always,

Hayley xx

Remember…

In the event of loss, setbacks and adversity, it’s easy to lose site of the shore. It takes effort to remain mindful and present to joy when your head is spinning with ‘what if’s’ and ‘if only’s’.

If you’ve found yourself caught in the murky abyss, hold strong. Your first job is only to acknowledge you are there. Tire yourself not with thoughts of how you wound up there and how on Earth you’ll ever get out, simply BE in the abyss and feel all the feels. Honour exactly where you are in this moment.

Trust that you have the power to heal and like anything, this shall pass. Now hand it over to a Higher Power, and let go.

All will be revealed to you in good time if you simply keep faith.

Remember, you are an infinite, unlimited being of light and LOVE. And with love in your heart ANYTHING is possible – even the murkiest of waters can be transcended into crystal clear rivers.

You, my Dear one, are completely unhindered. Place your feet firmly on the earth, arms stretched wide, eyes tilted to the skies, and smile.

Everything will be ok.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Soulful Sunday #60: The Other Side Of Fear

Welcome to my fifty-sixth instalment of ‘Soulful Sundays’; a weekly share where I post a roundup of soulful reflections, each including recipes, songs, quotes, blogs I have read and/or any other inspirational discoveries to sooth the soul.

For me, Sunday’s have become a day of quiet contemplation and simple pleasures. A time to reflect on the week gone by and to consider my dreams and intentions for the week ahead.

My hope is to extend some love outward and to share some simple pleasures with anyone who cares to receive them.

Soul Reflections

Fear is debilitating. It can literally leave us paralysed with anxiety.

There is a famous quote (and book for that matter) by Susan Jeffers who reminds us:

Feel the fear and do it anyway.

My biggest work over the last few months has been to face my fears around labour, particularly around the ‘normal’ practice of hospitals whose medical interventions often result in unnecessary trauma for both Mum and baby. Don’t get me wrong, in a medical emergency these procedures can save lives; but in a normal, safe, healthy pregnancy and birth, such interventions often cause more harm than good.  Is it any wonder then, that we hear so many horror stories about birth?

Once my fears were acknowledged, I could then begin to dissolve them. I turned to natural birthing books and absorbed myself in the thousands of positive birth stories (yes – they exist!!!) each contained. The more I read, the more I began to meet women who had birthed naturally, and with less complications (if any) than those who had birthed at the hands of doctors and drugs.

We also decided on Hypno-birthing classes to prepare ourselves for a calm birth using breath work, relaxations, visualisations, strengthening affirmations and natures own pain relief; oxytocin – all of which helped to deepen our confidence and trust in a natural birth.

Whilst our preparations do not guarantee us a smooth, uninterrupted birth with little to no complication or medical intervention; what they do provide us with are the innate tools to birth in love and trust, rather than shrouded in fear.

Of course, there are always some residue fears of the unknown and lingering What if’s? But since the only way out of my birth is through, I must ‘feel the fear and do it anyway.’

The only way out is through.

– Robert Frost

And through we shall go, in love and trust.

Soul Strolls

With three weeks to go until we meet our baby, strolling has become somewhat of a waddle! The pelvic pressure is real haha And so, after finishing my last week of work last Friday, I decided to put my feet up and rest this pregnant body.

I booked in for a pregnancy massage at Endota Spa (which was the best massage I’ve ever had, and I’ve had a lot!) and soaked up the healing vibes. I plan to spend the next three weeks resting and nourishing myself and our baby, and enjoying our last few weeks as a ‘two.’

‘Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.’ – Marcel Proust

Soul Recipes

This recipe is an oldy but a goody of mine. I love using my slow cooker, and this dish lends itself perfectly to one. It’s hearty, it’s comforting, it’s delicious and it’s even healthy My Hearty Lentil Curry gets a thumbs up every time. Let me know what you think!

Yummy lentil curry!

Soul Music

On the other side of fear lies freedom and peace. So today I would love to share this delightfully peaceful track by Ashana titled Deep Peace. Put you feet up, take a deep breath in and receive the deep peace flowing to you. Now sigh and release. You are free. You are safe. You are secure and loved.

Soul Sisters

Today I would love to share this beautifully nourishing poem titled Bliss by Aroused. A timely reminder for us to connect with our intuition within and to trust.

Wrapping you all in a warm loving hug on this soulful Sunday.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Soulful Sunday #55: Beautiful Bodies

Welcome to my fifty-fifth instalment of ‘Soulful Sundays’; a weekly share where I post a roundup of soulful reflections, each including recipes, songs, quotes, blogs I have read and/or any other inspirational discoveries to sooth the soul.

For me, Sunday’s have become a day of quiet contemplation and simple pleasures. A time to reflect on the week gone by and to consider my dreams and intentions for the week ahead.

My hope is to extend some love outward and to share some simple pleasures with anyone who cares to receive them.

Soul Reflections

At seven and a half months pregnant, I’m amazed by the number of women who feel compelled to comment on the size of my bump, comparing its size to that of their friend who is ‘due two weeks before me and is SO much smaller’, so small in fact you can ‘hardly tell’. I’ve even had my belly compared to a basket ball!

I’d like to think the women delivering these words are well intentioned and simply unaware of the potential harm their comments can cause. Still, I can’t help but feel a little disheartened that body comparison is so prevalent, even during pregnancy.

Isn’t a women supposed to feel beautiful and bountiful in her pregnant body? Is the fullness of her tummy not the fullest expression of creation itself? A time to celebrate the changes in her body as it nurtures new life within?

I have to acknowledge that I’ve also had many women tell me I look beautiful and stunning as I bloom to full size. To those Divine Goddesses; I salute you. For you are the ones who focus not on the ‘neatness of the bump’, or for how long it can remain disguised or ‘unnoticed’; but instead on the natural beauty to be embraced throughout the many changing phases of a woman’s body.

Today, let’s lift each other up. Let’s celebrate our bodies; big, small, teeny or tall, remembering that we are ALL Divine.

Soul Strolls

This week’s soul strolling took place in the hospital. We had our hospital tour where we were able to walk through where we’ll go on the day of our birthing. Despite having had some fears around birthing in a hospital, as I walked the corridors I blessed them with love and repeated the mantra, ‘All is well. I have nothing to fear. Love, peace, harmony and joy surround and indwell me.’

The Mercy Hospital for Women does feel like a safer space than my previous hospital. The midwives are very supportive of a natural birth with as little intervention as possible. I trust I am in safe hands.

Live your life as if everything is rigged in your favour.

– Rumi

Soul Recipes

My partner loves to buy a Massaman Curry from our local Thai. Since he spent this soulful Sunday working, I decided to surprise him with a Slow Cooked Lamb Massaman which was simply divine! I adapted the recipe slightly (and cheated) by buying a massaman curry paste rather than making my own from scratch, as this recipe suggests. If I owned a food processor I would definitely have attempted the homemade paste in this recipe… I also used carrots, red pepper and red chillies in addition to the potato instead of the green beans, since I already had those vegetables on hand at home.

Needless to say, this dish was yummy and my man had a happy tummy after a hard days work.

Soul Music

I’d love to share Heather Mae’s I Am Enough as a stunning reminder that our body’s are not ‘wrong’ or ‘shameful’. We can be grateful for our body, regardless of our shape or size. This makes me smile each time I listen. Today, give your body a big appreciative hug, tell your body how much you love it… and then have a good ole dance to this feel good track! I’ll be dancing along with you with my pregnant bump 😉

Soul Sisters

I’d love to share the work of a soul sister who has been pivotal in reducing my fears around labour. I bought Kat’s book in my second trimester when I was led to it by a serendipitous moment. It was just what I needed to believe in my abilities to birth my baby naturally. I will be gifting Kat’s work to any pregnant ladies I know! You can find Kat at The Birth Goddess.

Wishing you all a soulful Sunday. May you feel safe, supported and loved, today and always.

Love always,

Hayley xx

 

Flying Against The Wind

This week I’ve really felt what it feels like to be moving against the wind; but sometimes our resistance is part of our flow.

Just as the pilot navigates his plane through uncertain weather conditions, I too must trust in a safe landing despite the inner turbulence I’m feeling.

Resistance often indicates a need to let go of control, to completely surrender and trust. Yet resistance, when used in conjunction with intuition, can also be a strong reminder to trust in yourself first and foremost.

If you have a nagging resistance to something, there may be a reason why. Surrender and trust doesn’t mean that we have to agree to, and go along with every situation we are presented with.

If it doesn’t flow, let it go.

– Katrina Zaslavsky

If it’s not aligning with your hearts wishes, listen to what your resistance is trying to tell you, even if others think it unorthodox. Taking off against the wind may seem strange to some, but it’s the surest way to arrive at your destination in one piece.

Love always,

Hayley xx  

 

Dance dance DANCE!

Are you up on the dance floor yet? Or are you sitting on the sidelines watching everyone else have all the fun, too scared of making a wrong move or looking the fool?

Maybe you’ve convinced yourself you’re too tired to dance, and that you’ll dance another day? So instead of seizing the opportunity, you remain in your safe zone of comfort and watch as yet another opportunity passes you by.

Oh I know how this feels alright. I’ve been that bystander quietly wishing it was me shaking my tush all over the dance floor.

So today, I invite you to dance! To be seen. To be heard. To be witnessed in all your glory.

No longer will we remain dormant in our dream state. This moment is for inspired action. And it starts by getting your sweet derrière up on that dance floor to dance dance DANCE!!! 💃🏻🙌🏻💃🏻

Don’t let another opportunity pass you by.

Yeeeeow – I see you baby! Shaking that ass! 🍑😍

Love always,

Hayley xx

Goodbye Attachment

This week I’ve been focusing on releasing control and settling in to a place of deep trust and surrender. Releasing attachment is the key component to manifesting a desired outcome.

I could feel some discord surrounding my labour and desires to birth naturally. The unknown was putting me into a place of fear… “What if things go wrong? What if I’m not in the right hands? What if my support team doesn’t respect my wishes and I lose control when I’m at my most vulnerable?”

I have made a conscious choice to birth drug free, but I have no idea of the hows and when’s of my birthing experience; and this frightens the crap out of me!

Stop, breathe and relax.

Whatever your circumstances, once you have made a firm commitment to your ‘why’ – it is essential to release the need to micro manage and control the ‘what’s’, ‘when’s’ and ‘how’s.’

Grasping at every little detail only blocks the natural flow of events. Instead, try to remain patient, present and attentive to the synchronistic events that provide proof you’re on the right path.

Take action, but be open to receiving your desired outcome in ways that may differ from, and far exceed, your initial expectations.

Trust in yourself, but most importantly, trust in the Universal Laws that govern all of nature and all that is. As Gabby Bernstein reminds us;

The Universe has your back.

So let go. Have faith in your power, then surrender this to a Higher Power, who will undoubtedly take care of all the rest.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Soulful Sunday #50: Own Your Power

Welcome to my fiftieth instalment of ‘Soulful Sundays’; a weekly share where I post a roundup of soulful reflections, each including recipes, songs, quotes, blogs I have read and/or any other inspirational discoveries to sooth the soul.

For me, Sunday’s have become a day of quiet contemplation and simple pleasures. A time to reflect on the week gone by and to consider my hopes and dreams for the week ahead.

My hope is to extend some love outward and to share some simple pleasures with anyone who cares to receive them.

Soul Reflections

It’s a sad affair but one that unfortunately happens too often; we hand our power over to other people. Why do we do this? Because somehow, somewhere along the line we managed to lose our self-belief and in it’s place, developed a diminished faith in our own abilities.

But it’s time we stood in our strength and took back our power.

There is no doubt that we are highly intuitive individuals who need not rely on others to tell us how to live, especially when their advice feels counter intuitive to what our heart and our gut are telling us.

In this last week alone I have had two people, tell me that it’s highly unlikely I will be able to birth naturally. My response? I simply tossed their words in the ‘waste paper basket’ whilst sending them love.

Listen only to words that inspire, empower and uplift. Listen only to words of love.  Henry Ford had it right when he said:

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right.”

– Henry Ford

So today, believe you can. Embrace and own your true essence and power. Know that you posses all of the courage and grit required to achieve anything you set you mind to. Now do it.

Soul Strolls

It’s not often I take my camera out walking anymore. I like to keep my body light and free since i’m carrying a little person inside! But as our move to our new home approaches, I’d like to share a few shots I captured last year at my local park.

I stroll through Princes Park each night after work. Walking allows me to let go of the working day and to breathe fresh air into my lungs. My walks invigorate and nourish me. It’s a chance to clear my head and let go of any troubles I may be holding onto. Plus I get to move my body in a way that is gentle yet effective.

Here are just a few photod I’ve captured along my soul strolls to and through my local park. Hmm there seems to be a pink theme I’ve noticed….the colour of love?

 

Soul Food

This isn’t a recipe as such, but a little soul food that I arrived home to today after I woke feeling a little emotional and low on energy.

I went for a walk to restore my energy, only to arrive home to the scrumptious omelette lovingly prepared by my delicious man. He’s a little annoyed that it wasn’t ‘central’ on the plate before I snapped the photo, but as I gently reminded him – nothing is perfect, only perfectly imperfect in every way.

Soul Music

I am so in love with this track by Jai Jagdeesh, You Are Loved. Each words brings such profound comfort and joy. I urge you to listen to it again and again as I have! And as you do, ‘know you are loved.’

Soul Sisters

I usually share the words of a fellow blogger here each week, but this week I feel called to share two beautiful books I have been reading on the topic of natural birth.

Each one has empowered me on my journey towards a natural, drug free birth and has reminded me of my own inner strength and power. If you know anyone who is pregnant and may be feeling fearful about their labour, or has experienced a traumatic labour in the past – purchase one of these books as a gift. They truly are priceless gems of wisdom.

Authors Katrina Zaslavsky and Jenny Blyth have shifted my feelings of helplessness, dis-empowerment and fear about my labour, restoring within me a deep faith and trust in my innate ability to connect to my body, my baby and my birthing experience.

 

On this Soulful Sunday, know that I am wrapping you all in a warm hug, grateful hug. May you remember your strength. May you tune into your intuition. May you reclaim your power and go forth with confidence, ease and trust.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Soulful Sunday #49: Miracles Within

Welcome to my forty-ninth instalment of ‘Soulful Sundays’. A weekly share where I post a
roundup of soulful reflections, each including recipes, songs, quotes, blogs I have read and/or any other inspirational discoveries to sooth the soul.

For me, Sunday’s have become a day of quiet contemplation and simple pleasures. A time to reflect on the week gone by and to consider my hopes and dreams for the week ahead.

My hope is to extend some love outward and to share some simple pleasures with anyone who cares to receive them.

Soul Reflections

On this soulful Sunday I would like to share the news of our little miracle within. For the last 5 months I have been growing a little baby in my tummy! Eeeek! And what a journey it has been so far. Being pregnant with the miracle of life has caused me to become fertile with a myriad of magical possibilities.

“To be pregnant is to be vitally alive, thoroughly woman, and distressingly inhabited. Soul and spirit are stretched – along with body – making pregnancy a time of transition, growth, and profound beginnings.”

– Anne Christian Buchanan

I have journeyed through resistance, doubt and fear only to emerge on the other side feeling a profound sense of connection and a deep level of trust in the ‘unseen force behind all of life.’ To be part of life’s creation is to fully surrender to life’s dance; trusting that you will intuitively rise to the challenges and changes each new step presents. Pregnancy is not a time for control, but a time to let go, to trust and to flow with the rhythm of life.

Soul Strolls

Whilst I have been walking a lot during my pregnancy, most of our strolling has been to house inspections to house our growing family. A fortnight ago I shared with you a home we were sure was ours. Somehow, between talking with the landlord, submitting our application and the rental agency presenting applicants, our application was lost and we missed out. It’s still a mystery to this day what happened, as we never took the landlords number. And whilst it was a little disheartening at first, I was sure there must be a reason why things turned out the way they did. And of course, there was.

One of my wishes has been to have a little woodland themed nursery for our baby. But I knew that may not be possible with a rental. Often repainting requires clearance from landlords and not many wish for their neutral homes to be tampered with.

Well. Just last week we came across a rental that already had a woodland themed nursery! Talk about the Law of Attraction! After being declined for four rental’s, this was the one that finally pulled through. I now know that this is the home for us.

Our little nursery ❤

Soul Food

This week we treated ourselves to some Indian food. Yum! Not only was the food scrumptious and heart warming, but we also revealed whether we were having a boy or a girl over dinner.

I’d enlisted the help of one of my students to create some beaded love hearts; one in pink and one in blue.  Rather than have the lady reveal what we were expecting at the scan, we asked if she would secretly place the correct coloured heart into the box so we could reveal it to ourselves over dinner! Here’s the result:

What will it be?

Ooo the suspense!

Ta Daaaaaa!

Our Baby Boy ❤

 

Soul Music

Our baby is very responsive to music. Last weekend we saw Incubus live as well as Ed Sheeran. At both concerts baby was wriggling and kicking with content. I was too in the moment to capture any videos, but I’d like to share two of my favourite songs, one from Incubus, Wish You Were Here and Ed Sheeran’s Thinking Out Loud. The lyrics to both are beautifully timeless.

Soul Sisters

Today I’d love to share Kate’s poem, Incubation. Since i’m incubating a little baby right now, who I can’t wait to share with the world, Kate’s poem resonated with me deeply! I know you’ll enjoy this fun, insightful poem as much as I did!

Wishing each and every one of you a miracle Sunday.

Whether you are birthing new ideas, experiences and dreams or birthing new life – may you have full trust in your abilities and in the dance of life itself.

Love always,

Hayley xx