All Good Things Must Come To An End

This is me 2018. It’s been a year of extreme highs and inevitable lows; growing and birthing a beautiful baby boy has been magical, momentous and equally terrifying!

Motherhood has connected me to a love so profound it scares me how fiercely one can love another human; but parenthood has also brought me to my knees, literally. I’ve been floored both physically and emotionally and some days I’ve barely recognised the woman staring back at me in the mirror.

I’ve been pushed to all of my edges and limits and there have been days when I’ve cracked and broken into a gazillion pieces. Feeling vulnerable is an understatement. Parenting has a way of unearthing all of your unhealed wounds and past traumas. (I highly recommend it, it’s great therapy!)

Yet even in my darkest hours a silent voice has reminded me that I’m also resilient AF, and this woman is by no means shattered beyond repair. In fact, quite the opposite. I’ve earnt my strong Mumma wings and I am spreading them far and wide in 2019 with nothing but love and gratitude for this transformational journey I’m on. I welcome the continuing growth and expansion that’s to come for both myself and my little family.

I gave up on New Years resolutions years ago, but I do like to set a theme for the year and I’m making 2019 my year of TRUST.

I am trusting in myself, I am trusting in my intuition, I am trusting in my worth as a woman, I trust in my capacity to continue to give as a mother, I trust in the goodness of others, I trust that the Universe has our back and is supporting my family regardless of what life throws our way.

And on that note I’m shaking my booty into 2019 with a twinkle in my eye and a heart full of love, compassion, acceptance, forgiveness, faith and gratitude for all I have learnt and all I am willing to let go of.

2018, thank you for the lessons. 2019, I am ready!

I will be taking a break for blogging on WordPress but you can find me on Instagram and Facebook by following the links in the sidebar 👉🏻

Dear Dad has been my home for 5 years of writing, but I’ll admit I’ve struggled to maintain my blog since becoming a mother. It doesn’t feel right blogging here when I simply don’t have the time to reciprocate by reading all of your magical blogs.

And so I am taking a break from this platform but will continue to post on my Instagram feed!

I will reserve this space for its original intent, which was, and still is, a place for me to simply say: Dear Dad…

Thank you for being so supportive over the years and for the loving connections I have gained from this sacred space, I love each and every one of you 💖

Love always

Peace out ✌🏻

Hayley xx

Laugh And Let Live

I couldn’t agree more; parenting without a sense of humour is like a hamburger without the burger… Thankfully, my man and I have enough weirdness between us to rival the entire cast of Spongebob Squarepants 🤪

Humour makes even the toughest of days lighter, and if you aren’t already, I encourage you to add a hefty dose of belly laughter to your daily parenting rounds.

As cliché as it sounds, laughter really is the best medicine. You’re going to need it when your little one poops what resembles butter chicken all down your front for the third time that week💩💩💩 …and spews milky voms into your hair on a daily basis 🥛🤮🙈

What gets you through those tough days? Who’s your banter buddy that makes it all worthwhile?

Love always,

Hayley xx

Stop And Smell The Roses

There have been moments during the past seven weeks of parenting that I’ve experienced mild to moderate, to at times, even manic overwhelm. But I know not to beat myself up.

Mumming and breastfeeding non stop around the clock with little to no sleep can send even the most grounded of persons spinning off the earth’s axis.

I am not perfect, nor must I try to be.

In spite of the craziness, I love my little family unconditionally and wouldn’t trade any of this madness in for the world. For amidst the mayhem are bountiful blessings that make it all worthwhile; I am Mum to a beautiful, spirited son who lights up my world despite keeping us well on our toes; I have my supportive, hardworking spunk of a man by my side who provides buttery crumpets to warm my tum and endless laughter to warm my heart; I am also blessed enough to be surrounded by authentic women who I am proud to call my friends.

I honestly believe that the more grateful we are about life, the more life has to offer us things to be grateful for.

It’s so easy to get blindsided when emotions are running high, so today, tune in and count your blessings.

What blessings keep you keeping on?

Nothing in life is guaranteed, not even our next breath. As extreme as this may sound, it’s important to remember this simple truth if we are to appreciate all life has to offer.

Before becoming a Mummy I walked everyday, sometimes even twice a day for an hour each time. These days I am lucky to get a half hour walk depending on my sons mood… I have learnt not to expect my walk, but to be grateful when it does happen. This way I avoid disappointment and appreciate our time spent in nature all the more. I remember to ‘stop and smell the roses’ 🌹 Or in my case, these beautiful orange flowers (I have no idea what they are, feel free to educate me!) 😉

Today, stop and smell the roses. Notice your next breath and give thanks. Expect nothing and appreciate everything, and if you can’t appreciate it, at least accept it.

Love always,

Hayley xx

Perfect Parenting (No Such Thing)

One thing I am learning on this crazy parenting ride is that motherhood is a huge lesson in trust, acceptance and surrender; because there really is no such thing as perfect parenting.

Each day I’m turning new corners as I slowly embrace and accept all that is perfectly imperfect about mumming…

…From having to change and bath my baby boy twice within half an hour of waking (the poop explosions are real 💩💩😳) to having to turn back home just minutes from leaving my doorstep due to hysterical crying two days in a row (my little darling has suddenly decided he prefers being rocked to sleep in my arms during his afternoon nap over being walked to sleep in his stroller…) Bye bye nature walks, Mummy!! 👋🏻🌳😫

As defeating as these moments can feel, it’s impossible to remain frustrated for long… especially when I look at Kole’s tiny little face.

I am so very blessed.

A perfect Mum, I am not – but a good one? Yes I am. I love this tiny soul with every ounce of my being 💙🌈 And if that means giving up my afternoon walks for cuddles, then I surrender… 🤗

What else makes me a good Mum? Laughing after my son spits up milk all down my chest – only to see him chuckling (for the first time ever) right back at me with a mouth full of milk 🙌🏻🥛🤣

What is one of the million ways you are a good Mum? It’s time to acknowledge your superpowers!

Love always,

Hayley xx

The Folds And Creases

I am slowly beginning to accept the folds and creases as a normal part of motherhood; whoever says parenting is easy is bullshitting you. Motherhood is magical, but it’s also DEMANDING.

There are days I’m lucky to take a shower before midday, brush my hair or take a pee. Eating is limited to fruit and toast, and I’m often seen sporting two round wet patches where my milk has leaked through my nipple pads. Leaving the house looking like a scarecrow no longer bothers me – I couldn’t give two shits because I’m just grateful I left the house!

I’m in awe of mums who manage to look presentable and hold their shit together, I’m wondering when that day will arrive for me? But I’m also secretly wondering what’s really beneath the Mummy mask… because surely I’m not alone in this?

Today, let us acknowledge our deep, unwavering, profoundly passionate love for our children, but let us also acknowledge the grit it takes to live with the folds and the creases.

This squishy face makes all the sleepless nights worthwhile…

Love always,

Hayley xx

The Problem Is Not The Problem

As a Mummy who’s nursing a growing baby boy, I see firsthand how constant feeding rapidly increases growth. The same is true of our troubles – the more we feed them, the bigger they grow. ‘Energy flows where attention goes.’ – Michael Beckwith

The more attention we pay to our problems, the bigger our problems become.

This week, as our little one heads into his first growth spurt, we’ve been faced with the challenge of an unsettled baby each night.

In life, and as parents, it’s important to avoid getting too hung up on our troubles and to try to adopt a solution focussed mindset. Even the simple act of ‘letting go’ is far more freeing than trying to ‘fix’ everything and everyone.

Parenting is demanding business and the more we can pull together as a team the more energy we have to share our love and joy with one another.

Difficulties in life are inevitable. If we can learn to welcome adversity, we can trust in our learning and growth.

Today, when faced with a challenging situation, remember: It’s not the problem that’s the problem, but your response and attitude towards the problem.

Love always,

Hayley xx