Stop And Smell The Roses

There have been moments during the past seven weeks of parenting that I’ve experienced mild to moderate, to at times, even manic overwhelm. But I know not to beat myself up.

Mumming and breastfeeding non stop around the clock with little to no sleep can send even the most grounded of persons spinning off the earth’s axis.

I am not perfect, nor must I try to be.

In spite of the craziness, I love my little family unconditionally and wouldn’t trade any of this madness in for the world. For amidst the mayhem are bountiful blessings that make it all worthwhile; I am Mum to a beautiful, spirited son who lights up my world despite keeping us well on our toes; I have my supportive, hardworking spunk of a man by my side who provides buttery crumpets to warm my tum and endless laughter to warm my heart; I am also blessed enough to be surrounded by authentic women who I am proud to call my friends.

I honestly believe that the more grateful we are about life, the more life has to offer us things to be grateful for.

It’s so easy to get blindsided when emotions are running high, so today, tune in and count your blessings.

What blessings keep you keeping on?

Nothing in life is guaranteed, not even our next breath. As extreme as this may sound, it’s important to remember this simple truth if we are to appreciate all life has to offer.

Before becoming a Mummy I walked everyday, sometimes even twice a day for an hour each time. These days I am lucky to get a half hour walk depending on my sons mood… I have learnt not to expect my walk, but to be grateful when it does happen. This way I avoid disappointment and appreciate our time spent in nature all the more. I remember to ‘stop and smell the roses’ 🌹 Or in my case, these beautiful orange flowers (I have no idea what they are, feel free to educate me!) 😉

Today, stop and smell the roses. Notice your next breath and give thanks. Expect nothing and appreciate everything, and if you can’t appreciate it, at least accept it.

Love always,

Hayley xx

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Perfect Parenting (No Such Thing)

One thing I am learning on this crazy parenting ride is that motherhood is a huge lesson in trust, acceptance and surrender; because there really is no such thing as perfect parenting.

Each day I’m turning new corners as I slowly embrace and accept all that is perfectly imperfect about mumming…

…From having to change and bath my baby boy twice within half an hour of waking (the poop explosions are real 💩💩😳) to having to turn back home just minutes from leaving my doorstep due to hysterical crying two days in a row (my little darling has suddenly decided he prefers being rocked to sleep in my arms during his afternoon nap over being walked to sleep in his stroller…) Bye bye nature walks, Mummy!! 👋🏻🌳😫

As defeating as these moments can feel, it’s impossible to remain frustrated for long… especially when I look at Kole’s tiny little face.

I am so very blessed.

A perfect Mum, I am not – but a good one? Yes I am. I love this tiny soul with every ounce of my being 💙🌈 And if that means giving up my afternoon walks for cuddles, then I surrender… 🤗

What else makes me a good Mum? Laughing after my son spits up milk all down my chest – only to see him chuckling (for the first time ever) right back at me with a mouth full of milk 🙌🏻🥛🤣

What is one of the million ways you are a good Mum? It’s time to acknowledge your superpowers!

Love always,

Hayley xx

The Smallest Things…

There’s no doubt that parenting can be lonely business and often the days can seem long and repetitive. But the dichotomy is that I also never want these days to end… Why? Because there is SO much magic in the seemingly mundane, enough to turn even the longest and loneliest of days into my greatest source of joy.

For me, it’s in my morning conversations with Kole; it’s gazing into his eyes and seeing the future in them; it’s studying his ever changing expressions and realising an hour has passed by; it’s feeling his tiny breaths kissing my skin; it’s noticing his crying soften and his tense body relax the moment I hold him close to my heart… If it wasn’t for these moments of magic in our day, parenting would undoubtedly turn us all insane.

But thankfully, ‘sometimes the smallest moments take up the most room in your heart.’ Today, look for the magic. It’s there.

What are the small moments that take up the most room in your heart?

Love always,

Hayley xx

The Folds And Creases

I am slowly beginning to accept the folds and creases as a normal part of motherhood; whoever says parenting is easy is bullshitting you. Motherhood is magical, but it’s also DEMANDING.

There are days I’m lucky to take a shower before midday, brush my hair or take a pee. Eating is limited to fruit and toast, and I’m often seen sporting two round wet patches where my milk has leaked through my nipple pads. Leaving the house looking like a scarecrow no longer bothers me – I couldn’t give two shits because I’m just grateful I left the house!

I’m in awe of mums who manage to look presentable and hold their shit together, I’m wondering when that day will arrive for me? But I’m also secretly wondering what’s really beneath the Mummy mask… because surely I’m not alone in this?

Today, let us acknowledge our deep, unwavering, profoundly passionate love for our children, but let us also acknowledge the grit it takes to live with the folds and the creases.

This squishy face makes all the sleepless nights worthwhile…

Love always,

Hayley xx

Mothers Milk

Nobody said breastfeeding would be easy… So far my baby and I have experienced the initial breaking in period of cracked nipples, early onset of mastitis, and we are currently navigating an overactive let down which means I drown my son in milk each time we feed! Queue choking, frustrated baby who chomps down on my breasts to slow the flow…

There are times when I feel like giving up, but I know this breastfeeding journey will get easier with time. It’s worth me persevering to provide the best nourishment for my child.

‘Breastfeeding is a Mother’s gift to herself, her baby and the earth’ – Pamela K. Wiggins.

In some ways, breastfeeding prepares us for Motherhood. It is to place another’s needs before our own.

I understand breastfeeding isn’t for everyone, and I have no judgement towards women who choose alternative ways to feed their baby. As a bottle fed baby myself, I respect every woman’s decision as a choice.

For me, that choice has been to nourish my child with what Mother Nature provided. Not simply ‘because it’s free’ (…anyone who says that clearly doesn’t know the time and effort that goes into breastfeeding!) I choose the breast because this is the food that was intended for my baby to help him grow and thrive.

What sacrifices/difficulties/adversities have you experienced on your baby feeding journey? Did you reach a point when it all began to get a little easier?

Love always,

(One curious breastfeeding Mumma)

xx

The Rainbow After The Rain

Each day I receive a quote to my phone which appears in the form of a notification. On my birthing day, mid labour, this is the quote I received. It couldn’t have been more true.

At this stage I had endured a lot of rain and had been birthing for over 24hours. A pinched nerve in my lower back meant that my labour was not ‘flowing’ as I’d imagined. Determined to avoid any drugs or invasive pain relief that would pass to our baby’s system, I allowed the rain to pour down on me – hard and heavy.

I would say that the back labour and water injections used to alleviate the discomfort were far more distressing than any other part of the birthing process, which i’d always held as beautiful and powerful and still believe this to be true.

The pinched nerve demanded all of my attention and focus, and at times I questioned my ability to birth my baby boy naturally, if at all. But my rainbow came. And I love him with every ounce of my being 💙

In life, sometimes we wish to give up. We don’t see that in the midst of our pain and despair, there is a beautiful rainbow forming.

Today, I ask that you TRUST. No matter what your circumstances or how long you’ve ‘put up with the rain’ – have faith that the rainbow is coming. Trust that it is bright, beautiful, colourful and magical. And yes my dear, that rainbow is just for you. You are SO worthy 🌈

So this little bundle of love is one week old today 💙🌈

Wow, what a journey Motherhood is.

My life now consist of sleeping in three hour increments or less; poopy bums and milky burps are the main flavour of the day, and my breasts have been converted into a 24hour milk restaurant 🥛

BUT, holding you close to our hearts, hearing your little piglet snorts and seeing your dreamy smile as you sleep makes every ounce of tiredness worth it’s weight in gold.

We love you Kole Roy 💙🌈 Happy one week earthside beautiful boy,

Love always,

Mummy & Daddyxx

Mother Nature’s Dance

Dear Mother Nature,

For two days, we danced. You came to me in the early hours of Monday morning, and I leaned into your embrace.

‘I am here to dance

As we have for thousands of years

To a song I’ve never heard, but have danced a million times…’ – Storm Ellyatt

Slow and steady, I swayed to your rhythm, rising to the swell of each surge.

The dance was long and enduring, testing every ounce of our emotional and physical strength.

In the early hours of Wednesday morning you came thicker and faster, your pace more insistent and I could barely catch my breath before I was swept along – no longer in control, but completely surrendered and at the mercy of your power.

And then I heard you whisper in my ear: TRUST.

We danced, we moved, we fell breathless and exhausted, only to begin again this intoxicating euphoric sway of nature.

I stumbled, I rose, I fell again, and just when I thought I could dance no more, I roared my final roar… and then you gave us the gift of our baby boy 💙🌈

Welcome to the world Kole Roy.

Date: 1st Aug 2018

Time: 1:03am

Weight: 9 pounds 3 ounces

You are beautiful in every way. Words cannot express the depth of love we already have for you.

My deepest gratitude for my incredible birth companions, Daddy, Dasha, Michelle and Grandma Lorraine who came along for the dance and remained steady and consistent to each change in tempo.

And for the energetic support of my Divine friends and sisters, you gave me the courage and strength I needed to own my vision of a natural birth. We did it! It wasn’t quite the 3 hour birth I’d envisioned, but it was worth every last little ounce of energy!

We will be opening our arms and hearts to welcome visitors in two weeks time. We appreciate your love and patience in the meantime as we honour this sacred time to bond (and rest!) as a family and for bubs to gently adjust to his strange new world outside of the womb.

Love always,

Hayley, Daley and Kole Roy xxx