Home » Alignment » It Begins With You

It Begins With You



We often hear of the importance of loving oneself. However, for many of us, this is easier said than done. We fret over our appearance, compare our progress with those around us and berate ourselves when we don’t ‘get it right’. What is it that prevents us from showing ourselves the loving care and kindness we so deserve? We continue to exhaust our very souls in our attempts to please and meet the needs of everyone else, yet when it comes to ourselves – we just ‘don’t have the time’.

I am a big believer that we cannot fill the cup of another if our own cups are running on empty. We may be able to sustain this for a short while, but it wont be long before we become stressed, depleted and desperately out of touch with ourselves. It is vital that we take the time to do what makes our soul happy. But for many of us, we have forgotten what that even looks like. “Take time out?” we scoff. “I don’t have time for that…I need to take the kids to school/prepare the lunches/take care of my sick mother/earn a living…who will attend to all of these things if not me?” I hear this everyday from women. I’ve been that woman too – so caught up in the Doing that I totally neglect just Being. It saddens my soul to think that we are a nation that prides ourselves on how much we can get ‘done’, and at the expense of our health and our livelihood.

If we continue to ignore our own needs, wants and wishes, we will risk becoming unhappy, overwhelmed and stressed with the every day demands of life. Feelings of guilt and resentment are not uncommon for the chronic ‘Doer.’  “I should be doing something….I wish I just had five minutes to myself.” It is no coincidence that those who take time to nurture their souls and do the things they love lead less harried lives. It is not that they have more time or any less to do, but that they are able to approach tasks with a renewed sense of joy and energy, because they have carved out time to fill their cups. Only when our cups are full can they overspill to those we love. This isn’t selfish, it is essential.

So next time you are feeling anxious or overwhelmed, stressed out, run down or completely frazzled with by the long list of ‘To Do’s’ requiring your attention, ask yourself this: “Have I attended to the most important thing on that list? – my Self. Have I done something today that makes my soul happy?”

We cannot giveaway what we do not have. So love yourself. Be kind and gentle with yourself. Romance yourself. Know that you deserve to fill your cup every single day of your life. And that in doing so, you can bestow your loving gifts upon the world with a renewed sense of peace and joy in your heart.

In love and light,

Hayley xx


7 thoughts on “It Begins With You

  1. Pingback: Soulful Sundays #10: Self Acceptance | Dear Dad

  2. Oh, this is so true Hayley. How often do we forget to “romance ourselves”. I love that expression by the way, but sadly we so often put others first. Thanks for the reminder. Have a happy week ahead. xo

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Miriam! We sure do, and we are so surprised by how wonderful it feels when we remember – I hope you’ve had a romantic moment in your week Miriam, and if not, there’s still time 😉 xx

      Liked by 1 person

      • I can totally relate Miriam – sometimes we go days, weeks even of feeling frazzled. Moments of romance and pure, pleasurable peace seem so out of reach… We’ll get there I’m sure, if only for a moment. Thinking of you my dear friend xx

        Liked by 1 person

      • You’re so sweet, really you are Hayley. I’m just in the middle of writing a post on blessings and realise just how much I really have to be grateful for. Good way to shake myself out of the doldrums! xo

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you, Miriam. Counting our blessings really does help doesn’t it? We forget at times how much. And even though you have been feeling a little down in the dumps, you have still inspired, uplifted and brought a smile to my face 🙂 So on that note, and in keeping with the theme of your post: I am grateful for my wordpress friends, who always remind me that we all face the same struggles, that we are in this together, and that support and connection is love in motion xx


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